Page 2 of 2
By Missie Mayhem
There wasn't enough cereal for breakfast, so I announced a special treat: an Egg McMuffin morning! On the way to school, the boys were supposed to brush their hair, but Sammy spilled his orange juice on the brush, and Jacob retaliated by "accidentally" dropping his milk on Sammy's backpack. It was inevitable both boys would arrive on their first day smelling and looking like they'd crawled out of a compost heap. By the time Jacob realized he'd forgotten his math homework and Sammy informed me that he would be requesting that the principal fail him retroactively so he could go back to fifth grade, I began wondering where I had gone wrong.
When I finally double-parked in front of their new school, swarming with 2,000-plus kids, the boys just stared out the window like they were being pushed out of a shuttle over the moon. Again, I tried to calm their fears. “Look at these thousands of nice kids. Think about all your great classes — like trigonometry.”
“That’s high school math, Mom,” said Jacob.
“You know what I mean. Now have a great day!”
As I pulled away, I realized their lunches were still in the back seat — kids these days.
Don't want to follow in the Mayhem family's footsteps? Child and education experts weigh in on how to prep kids for a drama-free first day:
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