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Where to turn when teacher yells at student?


Anonymous January 31, 2009

My daughter is in the 5th grade and she's sensitive but also wanting to please. Since the start of school her teacher yells at the students in class and hurts their feelings. I've gone to the principal already and spoke to the teacher however it keeps on happening. I feel as if there is nothing I can do but ride it out. What should I do. How can I help my daughter?

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1seremen January 31, 2009

It must be a hard one for your daughter. What is the Principal doing to solve this problem.

What do you think is the really problem in the classroom. Why is the teacher yelling and not teaching. Talk again with the teacher and ask her for a suggestion on this issue. Also, have an on going discussion with your daughter and explain how she can accommodation some peoples' poor manner in the society. This attitude of her teacher exists every where in the society and it is unacceptable, but manageable.

Sometimes, I yell on my children and they refuse to take it personal. Life goes on!


eccentric January 31, 2009

Bigger question is, do you ever yell at your daughter, and does that hurt her feelings also? You should find out though why the teacher yells. Sometimes, it's completely uncalled for, and children tend to get more embarrassed outside their home when yelled at. Does this teacher yell at everybody or more at your daughter?


aries4571 January 31, 2009

wow! I can't believe at your response to my question. Life goes on........I've shrugged it off since school started how long should I do that? Yes, sometimes I do yell at my children however I also explain to them why they got in trouble and then we talk about it. I don't find it manageable when my daughter comes home crying on a number of occasions humiliated and embarrassed. School should be a place that my daughter feels good and safe not nervous and scared like she said.


vacekd1001 January 31, 2009

hi i was a teacher for many years. i did my best not to yell at students but there were times i did. one memorable time was when i was sub. teaching high school. the boys were having sexually explicit conversations right in front of me. there was a behavior plan and point system in the school but i did know the exact procedure. i asked the teachers aide what is the consequences for this behavior. she had a boys will be boys attitude. believe me this conversation was x rated. buy the end of the day i screamed at them so loudly that three other teachers came to the door and removed the students from my class.

so i think we need more information from you. what is going on in the class? what does the teacher say when she yells? is she name calling? this would unacceptable to me. is the class out of control most of the time? when i yelled i said shut up and sit down!

no one thinks it is ok that your daughter comes home humiliated crying and embarrassed. someone def. needs to get to the bottom of this problem. maybe you could observe in the class.

please give us more information so we can better help you.


maggie93215 February 4, 2009

I would go and do classroom visits stay and check out the environment. I would go to the prinicpal and let him know that this behavior is unnecessary. If he/she the principal does not help fix this problem you will be going to superintendent of schools. you will have them listening to your concerns then.


TeacherParent February 4, 2009

You ask a good question and I wish there were a good answer to it. It's a sad fact that some teachers are 'yellers'. Some teachers fall to yelling when very frustrated or very angry. Some schools actually believe in yelling and encourage their teachers to maintain discipline by yelling.
But some teachers in some schools yell all the time. They may have always yelled even from the beginning of their careers or they may have fallen to yelling as they tired of their teaching. Or they yell because they're just tired or sad- we all get older but some of us have greater problems than others and that can make us sad and then bad at work.

But when their work is teaching I believe it's very wrong to yell. I can't tell you why this teachers yells but I can tell you once started it's a very hard habit to break. Some parents don't seem to mind as much as others but as a parent, I minded very much if my children were yelled at all day long and I share your concern for the impact this has on your daughter.

Some people will tell you that there are all kinds of people in the world - and there are - and that we must learn to work with many different kinds of people and their personalities. They will tell themselves and tell their children that one day they may have a boss and the boss might be a yeller and they will have to accept that so let us accept now that your teacher is a yeller.

I never told my own children that when we encountered a 'yeller' and I wouldn't tell you that. A boss for an adult and a teacher for a child are two Very Different things. You can quit your job and bid your boss goodbye. You can negotiate with your boss adult to adult. These days you can even go to the Human Resources people and file a complaint - when it's your boss.
When it's your teacher and you're a child - there's nothing you can do. A child is helpless in the face of that abuse - and though some children mind it less than others to those children who mind it very much, the yelling is abuse. And it's an abuse of power as well - no teacher given power over the well-being of children should abuse that power by frightening and demeaning them.
I'd be interested to know what the principal said to you - did he deny or defend this teacher's yelling? And I'd be as interested to know what the teacher said to you when you spoke with her - not every parent is as brave as you including Teacher Parent and I admire very much that you tried to speak with her.
Sometimes... we can temper their temper with some kindness or some charm. Sometimes we can lessen the yelling directed at our child while it continues with the others. Being around the school as often as is possible can help to diminish the yelling directed at our own child - yelling teachers most often don't yell in the presence of parents. Does this teacher tone it down when others are around?

But if we can't tone these yelling teachers down -principals can almost Never tone their yelling teachers down - then we're left to explain it to our children as best we can. I could never bring myself to say outloud what I felt inside - I felt powerless to protect my child. Nothing hurts a parent more.
Our explanations to our children can differ depending on our beliefs. Some parents feel they should never criticize their child's school to their child. Some parents want their children to see school as a place of perfection.

I wasn't such a parent. What was most important to me was that my children know, it wasn't them. It wasn't them or anything they did that brought on the yelling - the yelling came from deep inside this teacher. Maybe this teacher's parents yelled at her and she doesn't know a another way to be. Maybe this teacher's teachers yelled at her.... and she doesn't know another way to teach.

I would go to great lengths to Not have such a teacher - I recommend to every parent they keep their ear to the ground as to the next year's teachers and request the teacher that is right for your child. The school may not honor your request but you'll have the satisfaction that comes from having tried.

But until next year - meet this teacher's every demand. Give her no reason or room to yell at your daughter - when we have such teachers, it's wise to dot our 'i's and cross all our 't's and to gently advise your child to do the same and stay out of Teacher's way through each school day as best you can.


vacekd1001 February 4, 2009

teacherparent good answer. it is a tough question.


JaqG28 February 17, 2009

Hi! Do you know other parents who have their child in the same class? If so, maybe everyone can get together and speak to the prinicipal as a group. Also, is it possible that if the principal is not helping - all of the parents concerned can file a complaint with the Board of Ed? Just a suggestion.



tobbyandlui February 17, 2009

I agree with maggie93215, I would do the same, my kids are very sensitive when it comes to a teacher that screams to the kids. I really don't like it at all when a teacher comes and screams at a kid or to mine. Once it happened with my oldest daughter when she was in kindergarten, I went right away to her teacher and told her straight, that I don't really like her screaming to my daughter at all, I asked her to please not to do it again, that if she have any kind of problem with my daughter, I was going to talk to my daughter about it, instead of her screaming at her, after this, my daughter didn't have any more problems with her teacher.


Suomi0304 February 22, 2009

Where did this teacher teach before? Back in college I was placed in a suburban kindergarten room. Well, their teacher previously had been in an inner city alternative high school. She was BRUTAL.

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