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Their parent or their friend?


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sbozarth23 May 7, 2008


What do you think? When it comes to your stepchildren should you be a parent or a friend? Which role did you choose and why?


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sbozarth23 May 8, 2008


I know it is hard on her for him to live with me during the school year. We try to make things easier on her, I made a folder and keep things he made for her or did at school in it. I also help him write her letters from time to time. I am looking at some literature right now as a matter of fact about stepfamilies. He's almost six now and he asks me a lot why his father and his mother never got married rings etc. There are times when I honestly don't know what to tell him. What's hard for me is I'm the only one he asks these questions. When I told his mother and father they had no clue he had those thoughts. I will keep at it thanks for your reply :)

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sissywilcox May 8, 2008


wow looks like she needs to grow up!! my husbands ex still gets rage out of this and like I said they are all grown ups now.. It was really bad when they were little..I even told her that she needed to grow up and stop acting like a child

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sbozarth23 May 27, 2008


Thank you! I have bent over backwards to please this complete stranger, all for the sake of her son. My husbands gratitude for all I have done is endless, but there have been times when I wanted to throw my hands up at this situation. I love my stepson but how did you get through it YEAR AFTER YEAR?

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MommaMojo May 19, 2009


I have been on both sides of this situation. Based on experience and professional opinion, it is never good for a child to call a non-parent mom or dad. I made the mistake before knowing all this of letting my sd call me Momma. It hurt her mother more than words could say. Later on the therapist (and books) said it's never good to let a child call you mom or dad. After that, we stopped it.

One must also take into consideration(and if you have kids you'll get it) how horrible it makes the real parent feel. You have to allow another person to some what step in where you should be. That is hard enough, someone else getting your title? That is not right.

A step parent should be there to help take care of the child...feeding, dr. visits, laundry, mentoring, be a friend. But there are boundaries and we as step parents need to respect them.



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