I have sent all of my children through the same school district. My oldest is 22 now. My youngest is 11. My next oldest had a problem with a teacher in 5th grade. We ended up switching him to another teacher and had no problems after that. When my 11 yr. old this yr. ended up having the same teacher, I requested that he be enrolled with a different teacher. The school district refused. He is now having problems with her.
I have to say, that (I think) due to my refusal to have her as a teacher for my 4th child, she has tried harder. But, the principal has gotten in the way. She is a very controlling, and manipulative personality. My 5th grade son is one that needs to have things explained in detail. He is not stupid. He has good grades, and gets along with his peers. However this year, with a new principal, and his having to deal with bullying issues, he has changed.
He is tired of trying to be the nice guy. He is tired of going to the supervisors and or teachers/principals when he's been bullied. He finally struck back and ended up in the principal's office. So now he's feeling like he's in a catch 22. He's frustrated, and upset.
He does what he can to NOT go out to recess. He also struggles with the instructions given for certain assignments, mostly math. They go over it too quickly, and he gets confused. They get upset, because he wants to go back to step 1, and they don't. I believe he needs some counseling which I'm striving to get for him.
Last week, he had a hard time getting his work done (math) in class. He was pulled from his class, and sent to the principal's office. She tried to get him to complete his homework. She is a rather "hard" person. She's like, "do it my way or the highway" kind of person. He did not respond to this in a positive way. He is not a violent child. He cried, tore up some papers, and broke a pencil in half.
The principal called me several times during the day. I was at work, and could not leave as I was the only person in my shop, and could not close up. (many miles away, as well). Because he "destroyed school property" (his own pencil and paper) and because he tossed his book on the floor (not at any person or object), she decided he needed mental counseling intervention.
She called the county mental health dist. and told them there was a crisis and that my child needed to be taken for in patient care. The counselor arrived, assessed the situation and determined that it was not a crisis and that he was not of age to be able to be taken w/out parental consent.
My husband was able to leave work early, and went to the school. He said that the principal was livid that the county could do nothing to "take care of the problem now", The counselor who arrived from the county stated that he seemed fine, and was in no need of in patient care at that time.
I have since pulled my child from that school and am looking at other alternatives. I have learned from other parents that they have sent their children to other schools either because of altercations with this principal or because they had a bad impression when meeting with her at the beginning of the school.
I am now awaiting a "face to face progress report" from the county on the situation. Pending what the counselor reports and what she told me, I intend to take this principal to task. Any thoughts, advice, and comments, be they negative or positive would be appreciated.
Hi mylovekids and welcome to GreatSchools Elementary School community.
First let me say how sorry I am this happened to your son. Do you have any idea how the county will proceed and if they'll allow you to transfer schools? I'm not always a big fan of online schooling, but given what your son has been through, you might want to see if your state pays for online schools such as k12.com. For instance, in California, many districts allow students to "attend" California Virtual Academy (CAVA) where students meet with a teacher for some part of the time and work on their own the rest of the week.
It's clear to me your son can not return to the 1-2 punch of bad teacher and bad principal. He'd have no refuge there. If the district/county doesn't move fast enough, I'd definitely pursue the online option so he doesn't fall behind.
Sorry to hear about what your son was going through. What school is this? Did you find another school? I have a daughter in 5th grade at Valley View it's a good school, you might want to try there. As far as the principal at the school you will know what to do when you receive your "face to face progress report" from the county.
Sorry for what you are going through. I can relate and what I have done is move out of the school dist. and in my case file charges and the news station want to do a report. I put up with mine for 2 school years and will not no more. You have to stand up for our children and how you do it is different with every situation but standing up for your child is the same no matter what it call loving them and caring for them. Best wishes to you and good luck!53103
I am So sorry for what your son, yourself and your family are going threw. It sounds very uncalled for. Your son sounded frustrated. I think you should notify the board it seems like this principle is a little in over his / her head.
I am facing hard times as well not to this extreme, however i felt ridiculed and tosted aside when i approached the principle at my child's school concerning a personal situation. Never the less i contacted the board and explained my situation. Lets say i am awaiting the call of the principle and all i am getting are calls and letters concerning the situation from school staff. So, I will be placing another call to the board as well as sending them a copy of the letter i received after notifying the principle. Sometimes these people are so set in there ways they forget how to deal with things properly. Just know that you are not alone. We have all been put in situations that arent even necessary. Go do your thing, and after all is said and done place a complaint against that principle.
if you dont mind me asking what district are you in? 53115
Sorry to hear of your dilemma. Your son is at risk for losing his self esteem/ self respect. Your principle is abusive - and controlling/ manuipulative people always feel justified in their behavior. They are toxic people whom you should just avoid because you will never win with them. So, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR SON - remove yourself from her influence. Don't tell her what you think, just go. Your job is to take care of your son. The school board's job is to take care of the school.53127
i feel the frustration. i will never forget how the principal at the brooklyn new school yelled at my child several times in her office and in front of me. the same day she wanted to refer my child for evaluation and a special needs program. i also witnessed her picking on him throughout the year by assigning a para yet she did not inform the parent. i waited for the school year to end before taking my child out. i still regret waiting so long. less than a half a school year later my child has progressed from reading failure to above average in comprehension and fluency and is reading complicated chapter books. my child is also above average with math scores and received both an academic achievement award and a music achievement and citizenship award. the school environment is different. there is the support needed for the students. the teachers show respect and never yell. the students respond to this role model manner. my child feels safe and happy and made friends with everyone in the classroom the first week of school. i should say that he hardly wrote in school when at bns. but i was also aware that this was true of many in the classroom. his writing skills are now developed and show developed clarity. the best advice for any parent is to follow your instinct. i regret i did not report my findings to the department of ed to support other children. this feeling was reinforced when i met another parent whom i learned pulled out her child the same time and for the same reasons. also, the only children that seemed to transfer from this school at earlier grades seem to be of african american decent. principals can be better evaluated so children can receive the opportunity in education that they deserve and also to protect those that have parents unable to measure and determine the needs. why did it take so long for someone to learn that your child needed to go back to the basics before going forward? did he receive any learning experience when he was removed from the classroom in order to receive his equal opportunity in education? what did the the school provide for him while he was not in the classroom to make sure he was receiving a learning experience? are the classroom sizes too large to keep up with the needs therefore the school inadequately staffed for the numbers they allow? did the school ever provide a plan for your son? 53135
You know I was one of those kids in elementary and middle school like your son. I was constantly getting into arguments with teachers who, on more than 1 occasion, told me that I was "stupid" or "I am not going to explain this again, you'll never understand it anyway..." What they didn't know was that I had a learning disability. Have you had your son tested (which you can request in writing from the school)? A learning disability doesn't mean they are not smart, it just means their brain processes things differently. I was not diagnosed until I was a freshman in college! I then went on to double major with a minor in college, have a masters degree and am licensed to be a psychotherapist. Not to bad for a kid who was, "stupid".
My son is now in 6th grade honors and just got straight A's...with a learning disability. I am not saying that this is definitely the issue, but you have the right to ask for testing which could lead to an IEP which could provide accommodations and the NEED for teachers to explain in a way that does not make your son feel "stupid".
Hi I am an OT for children...I deal with all kinds of problems and issues....when you were discribing the difficulties that your son was having with math...It sounds like he has a visual memory issue...or visual perceptual problems which are caused by the muscle tone in the eyes....when the child has to look up at the board then down at the paper there could cause misalignment ( if any misspelled words please forgive I am Dyslexic ..You are what you treat) I have worked with many children with these issues...his eye site may be 20/20 however the muscle tone could be the problem... www.walesbyvisioncenter.com Check out this web site...if your child does have this diagnosis there are laws to protect him.... many blessings...Dody53142
mylovekids, I know that you are angry because of the insensitivity of your schools principal but as I was reading your blog the only thing I could think about was the focus is on the wrong folks (the teachers and principal) I was thinking what is causing this child so much trouble academically and socially. And what can she do to help him. If he is having a hard time functioning in a mainstream classroom, why? Does he have a learning disability that needs to be addressed so he can learn the way he needs to. Sometimes as parents we don't want to face these issues. Like mamw29 stated it doesn't mean he's not smart. People learn differently and unfortunantely public schools cater to a specific learning style. Also if this whole situation has gotten him so upset and angry that he had a melt down, I think you should consider getting someone to talk to him to sort things out. Don't get me wrong I do think that the principal really went too far. But my greater concern is what your son really needs and what is going on inside of him emotionally.53148
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