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How can my 2nd grade girl learn to deal with mean girls.


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Anonymous May 28, 2008


How can my 2nd grade girl learn to deal with mean girls.

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wildfire May 28, 2008


If there are mean girls at her school and they don't leave her alone. And she has already asked them to stop bugging her. Than she should report them to the teacher or the princelpal at her school! And if that doesn't work. Than get the parents phone number and call up the mean girls parents!

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Anonymous May 28, 2008


I have addressed it with the teacher who claims she has seen nothing. This has been going on for a while and I did try to address it with the parents they claim they spoke to the girl but it continues. I dont want to go overboard I want her to learn to stand up for herself as I did, its so sad.

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Cinderbell May 28, 2008


Sorry for your daughters troubles. Sometimes a way out of these situations is to teach your daughter to ignore, ignore, ignore....and these other girls might go away, usually though, to find another victim to harrass. As hard as it is to shrug off this behaviour from others, sometimes it is the only way.

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Anonymous May 29, 2008


My daughter is in fourth grade and has had alot of problems with girls being mean this year. She didn't want me to get involved so I convinced her to go to the guidance counselor who was a great help. The counselor talked to the girls and even did a class presentation for my daughters class about friendship, cliques, etc...It's been a great help.

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wildfire May 29, 2008


Since the mean girls won't stop harassing your daughter at school and the teacher just ignores it too! Take it to the princepal at the school! And if that doesn't work! Ask princepal for the mean girls parents phone number for there work and home or cell phone and call them up and talk to them! Thats what i call taking the bull by the horns! And good luck!

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washashore May 29, 2008


This is a hard situation to be in. I stepped in and brought it to the teachers' attention and it got worse for my daughter! I recommend reading the book, "Queen Bees and Wannabees" by Rosalind Wiseman - it is about the social structure of girls, where your child fits in, self esteem and what you can do to help your child in bullying situations. It was written more towards older middle/high school grades but my sister who teaches 2cd grade actually borrowed it from me and is now recommending it to the parents of her students because Bullying is becoming more of a problem in the lower grades as well. I hope it helps you. Good Luck!

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drjohnson May 29, 2008


First of all, we really don't know what this "mean girl" is doing or the larger setting. We don't know if this is a general bully, a "friend" or just an acquaintance. We don't know if this is one kid who's got it in for one other child, or a gang of girls picking on many kids.

I do know that we were very lucky in our school, to have a proactive girl scout troop. They did many team building activities when this sort of thing started to show up. Unfortunately, the meanest girls didn't belong to the troop.

The school is also pretty responsive to bullying. But the social nastiness that girls use is often harder to notice and address.

The biggest problems my daughter had was with an on again, off again "friend". These are damaging relationships because the behavior goes on and on and your own child is motivated to to stay "friends". So my daughter is sometimes sucked into mean behavior toward other kids. But at least when there is a "friendship", you have access to the problem child.

I take into my own hands during the on again phases. I tell the group of girls (I have twins, so there's always a group) what behavior is unacceptable when I see it. And when we were watching movies or discussing issues that ring bells for me, I directly tell this child that certain behavior is inappropriate, while describing the appropriate behavior. I know that there is at least one other mom of a mutual friend who does the same thing.

I would say that this campaign has had moderate success. But moderate is better than nothing. It's a long term project. But it's surprising sometimes, how well another child, even teens, will listen to you. If nothing is said, they figure their behavior is ok.

I've had some success with this "village parenting" thing in a number of different situations, even with kids I don't know. I don't act like I'm accusing them of being hooligans, but more like I'd respond to a neighbor child, assuming some ignorance or need of guidance. "Guys, watch your language, remember you've got little ones in earshot!". Or in the mean girl situation, "Girls, Breanna isn't sure what to do here. You need to remember to include her in your game."

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tjlove May 30, 2008


Here's a link to an article from the GreatSchools Library called, "How Do I Help My Daughter Deal with Mean Girls?"
http://www.greatschools.net/cgi-bin/showarticle/880

You can check out all the articles in the GS Library by clicking on the "Library" button in the green toolbar above.

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deedee47 May 31, 2008


I think extra circular activities is a great way for your daughter to meet friends and may help keep bullies away.
It not only helps your children develop lasting relationships, it builds their character which may help them deal with those pitiful bullys.

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Childsrights June 2, 2008


Our society seems to put it on the ones who get bullied. Big mistake! In a work atmosphere according to my HR department this would not be allowed. There are laws against it. When I was younger I had a woman harassing me at work & she was addressed. Another place of work a woman was let go for harassing a co-worker. Both were told they had no right to create a hostile work place. What is wrong with our school system if they don't pull the parents, students, teachers, principal & counselor all in to give notice to everyone involved of a similar policy (anti-hostile educational atmosphere). Make everyone accountable to keep on top of it; have them sign contracts. It seems more & more these days our children have so little rights. The tail (bully) is waging the dog (school& parents). Even the adults are scared of these kids. Get a grip people! Be parents & educators get active give the kids guidance love & support. All the adults in these situations should get involved. These bully girls will have to learn sometime or they may be up for loosing their jobs one day. To check out on these kids is a huge disservice to everyone in our communities.



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