"so good beautiful&tallented school nevear seen such school which give
information of bad thing which makes habit good of child
"I found parental guidance in the article to be sound and openminded. The
scathing comments berating her parenting techniques and choices are
repulsive. It was like reading a modern day witch trail. "NO CELL PHONE!
NO FACEBOOK! that will solve the problem!! WHAT KIND OF PARENT ARE YOU!?"
Sure remove all modern forms of technology ...it will ensure those
parents don't have to do the work involved with compromise and lessons
through experience. This mother is choosing to parent in a" freedom with
full disclosure" method and I applaud her for it. She also sounds like she
takes the time to get to know her son..and also knows that he and his
sexual interests are not seperate subjects until "18 years of age" but
rather an evolving process of growth. She probably talks about sex to her
son...if that sentence makes you uncomfortable, or if you haven't
developed a relationship where your child is comfortable talking to you
about sex, then that is the parent that creates an environme!
nt for repression, and manipulation because it is a human need. Sex is a
human need...not something that starts at 18...or when they are out of
your house. It starts developing at puberty and needs helpful management
from that point on. Done well, it is a subject that promotes bonding and
builds trust. Totalitarian parenting is a wall building form of parenting
that creates shame, and seperatism.
"i understand the dangers but isnt it still bad to send inappropriate thing
to people not noing if they will post it on face book or send it to the
enter world even if it is only sexy text with no pictures?????
"I just caught my son, a 15 year old sexting with some girl in another
state. this girl was a previous girl friend. I find absolutely nothing
cute or funny about him and this girl sending text's back and forth with:
"thrusting, licking, arched back and screaming" I think we get the point.
This is not cute, funny, or okay. I did not even have a pager when I was
in High School. This needs to be addressed as it is WRONG and not to be
done until you are of age.
I am not opposed to parents being held accountable for the kids actions.
Unfortunatly in my situtation he lives more often with his mom my Ex-wife
who may be one of the "its okay and cute" kinds of people.
If the kid is a teenager all they really need is the use of a phone not
the internet and all the other stuff.
What ever happened to the days of someone having to call your house and
mom and dad answered the phone...
"Oh, I just read page 2, and I realize it is sexting. The other part of my
comment stands. What is wrong with this site and with this author??
"Agree w/other commenters. It doesn't sound like the author's son is
actually "sexting." If he is, it's a serious matter, not appropriate
behavior for a teen! I am shocked that GreatSchools has published this
article without editorial comment!!
"You are extremely naive. Sexting is when people send racy messages back and forth that are flirtatious, use 'dirty talk' and quite often include photos of thier sexual parts and sexual activities. I do not think this is charming or endearing behavior for any teenager.
"This is the worst article about parenting ever. What does this parent think she teaches her son?!: how to become a porn star or a healthy man who should be able to communicate with a girl his age no matter how shy he is. why is he shy? There is always a reason for it. His parents should work on that issue, not allowing him to hide behind a stupid cell phone and "date" 8 middle schoolers at the same time. What kind of attitude is that?! What happened going to the movies in a group of friends and interacting with other human beings in a healthy way not developing skills of a man who thinks girls are toys meant to be used for his training. Disgusting parenting! And we criticize muslims for not respecting women. How about America?
"This is obviously an emotional and dangerous issue. I think perhaps the misunderstanding comes from not knowing what this boy is texting- his mother says he is "flirting". If he's just saying he likes a girl or other complimentary messages, that's not sexting and there's nothing wrong with it. If he's being explicit then it's not a cute way for him to get used to interacting with girls, it's a way to hide behind a screen and be inappropriate. I attended a very good seminar that pointed out no matter what you do you cannot delete technology from kids' lives, and the best thing you can do it let them use is and monitor very closely. If you let them loose on the world without an experience and making a few mistakes when you can correct them (and it's not on a permanent record) that's far better than a suicide or a prison sentence as adults, simply because they had no idea of any of it because their parents denied them a phone and a facebook. We can't live in pioneer days !
so you need to help your child through it, like it or not. With love, and close supervision.
"I had a problem with my step son sexting. His girlfriend got him to do it after she sent pictures of her private parts. We had him do research on the laws of sexting and write a paper (one page) on sexting. Then we sat down with him and explained why he was not allowed to do it. He ended up breaking up with the girl because she wanted him to continue sexting. We do random cell phone check and found the new girlfriend was sending pictures of herself taking bubble baths. We sent a text from the son's phone to the girl and told her to stop or we will share the pictures with her daddy. The girl freaked but she got the point. We took the phone away from the son for a week (cell phone is a priviledge, not a right) and had AT&T block all pictures from being sent and received. I told him that he can send and receive pictures once he turned 18 and got a phone in his own name. I'm not risking my job for any teenager in my house who wants to sext.
"What's so unfortunate about this article is that it is parents just like
this author who are ALWAYS on the news after the fact (the
arrest/sentencing/tragedy/etc) saying "they thought it was harmless" and
"didn't know it would lead to this"! Just where do you think thoughts of a
sexual nature lead? Talk about about fuel for the fire. How about parent
actually PARENTINGÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ and stop being so concerened whether their child will
actually like them. News flashÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ parenting is erecting and enforcing
boundaries. But rest assured if this author won't, eventually the
authorities will and they won't be as sympathetic!
"What ever happened to taking a cell phone away and deleting Facebook
accounts? I've done both and eliminated the problem.
I'd also like to know what the author would think of her child were she a
daughter instead of a son. Something tells me she wouldn't try to make it
sound quite so endearing.
"I know this problem started long before texting! Like it or not the truth is
that all of AmericaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s woes started in June of 1963 when pray and the bible
was banished from the public schools. At this very point is when the hoards
of hell came pouring into this blessed nation. Before this time was when
most American's were sound minded and moral. You take God out of the eqasion
and you get a vacuum that is filled up with evil. Therefore, sound minded
people became less and less. America now has warped minded parents that
think this article is a solution in how to deal with teens with this type of
behavior! God help us in Jesus name!
"I am amazed at the stupidity of this mother. Her son, and his lack of
respect for the young ladies he hopes "if all goes well" to touch, is
sadly condoned by his own mother. She appears to even be proud of her
son's sexting habits. I would guide my daughter to stay clear of any boy
who would have such an ignorant mother who would encourage her son to use
young girls to get some sort of sexual thrill over the phone. Young ladies
should not be treated in the manner in which this women is encouraging her
son to do. Her son in no gentleman!
"good article and thanks for including the references, very informative,
"I don't understand the number of kids allowed to have a cell phone these
days. If they aren't paying the bill and/or aren't using the phone
wisely, they shouldn't have one. The phone would be GONE and the computer
locked down immediately in the case of sexting. Kids are becoming
socially backwards these days because of all this lack of real life
interaction. The writer is not doing her son any favors by allowing or
turning a blind eye to this kind of behavior. Too many grown men in the
dating world text instead of talk these days and have zero concept of what
actual courtship is about. Great, now we're gonna have one more to add to
"I am surprised by this article. The mother states that she realizes how
dangerous sexting can be, even mentions bullying, criminal prosecution,
etc, but acts likes it's ok for kids to do it because it's "popular.". I'm
sorry, but you are condoning this poor behavior for your son just because
"everyone else is doing it". Don't you remember the saying growing
up.."just because your friend jumped off a bridge....". When are parents
going to start being parents instead of "friends" to their children. My
co-worker let's her 9 year old have a facebook account because "all of her
friends have one.". I'm sorry but legally you need to be 13 for an
account. If more parents weren't afraid to say no to there children and
enforce rules and teach children the difference between right and wrong,
then maybe we wouldn't have the pressures that 13 year olds think it's ok
to send explicit photos of themselves to "be liked". It's time to teach
children they can't have everything they want jus!
t because they want it or feel entitled. A liitle respect and discipline
will go a long way when they grow up and enter the real world.
"Is this mother kidding? She sounds like a pure idiot and if this web site
supports something like this, they are no better and is not the site I
want to be associated with.
Are you people really stupid or what?
Eliminate texting on his phone, along with voice mail and ban him from the
It is about time you parents out there start taking responsibility for
your children and how you act around them. Not it is not acceptable in
this day and age no matter what your perverted twisted mind is telling
Wake up you people and start managing your children like an adult and the
parent you should really be.
Good God people are you guys totally fixed on drugs or are you just that
"First, I was stunned at the email's title, "Teens and Sexting: SHOULD
parents put a stop to it?"(caps added). Really? You have to ask "should"?
It's child porn for one thing so, at a min. there are legal issues for
your kid. Even more though is the porn habit this will lead to that will
affect their whole life. And what message does this send re: why we value
women/girls? Second, this parent isn't worried that her son sees himself
as a "playa" and is dismissive re: his 'text dating' 8 different girls?
Isn't this establishing that it's OK to be leading on various girls @ the
same time? Maybe all these girls know he's doing this, but I suspect it
involves some deception and dishonesty about his intentions. Isn't this
"mistreating the girls?" She's right that these years are "practice."
For what kind of relationship is he practicing exactly?
"how to handle?? STOP giving the teens unlimited texting! my kids about to
start driving andIJUST gave her a cell phone with NO texting added. She
can, however it's meant to be reserved for emergency use.. this way it
forces them to interact face to face or actually use their voices to speak
to one another. it's too easy to hide behind a screen and letters....
"Wow, I'm impressed! This seems very level-headed and thoughtful, and
helped me think about how to handle these things when my kindergartener is
a teenager. Thanks.
"I think this problem began long before texting came out on the scene I
think the provocative influence first began with the TV I think people
want to lay blame on new technology and I don't think that is fair
especially when the problem existed before using the Cell Phone & the
internet is just another avenue for this type of behavior
"I very much appreciation the sane and nonprudish perspective of this
article. Yes, sexting is fun for teens, yes it's harmless until it lapses
into bullying or other disrespect, and yes most of the dangers have to
with it clashing with the sex-negative authority structure (well, that and
possible humiliation by peers). As a parent, I feel like I've been given
a bit of permission here not to freak out but to be involved. I like