"I need help dealing with an aggressive 13 yr old step son who has grown
almost a foot taller than me. He is always pointing sharp objects in my
face & recently actually made contact with my left eye. Fortunately it was
a Nurf sword, but I'm tired of it and my tolerance level is peaking. I
have asked repeatedly (and now commanding him) to stop. I fear my response
for back-lashing is growing. The boys father isn't seeing what I'm seeing,
plus the boy tends to act out more when Dad isn't around. Mom thinks her
boys are perfect; so I feel alone in this situation. What can I do?
(history purposes, I came into this family long after Mom & Dad were
divorced; I'm not sure how much the boys know about the divorce, but Mom
has taken steps to ensure Dad was the bad guy; Dad is a wonderful man and
good father; he's struggling to understand his sons lashing out at me)
"My daughter is 11, not interested in studying at all, does not talk much,
watch tv everyday, not keen on doing homeworks, very quiet girl, and only
to those she is close to like family members. I believe she has only few
friends in school and even teacher said she is too quiet where compared to
his brother who is 8 in the same school. What should I do to change her
attitude? nervous parent "
"my 13 yr. old daughter seems very polite and nice talking to others (even
her father) but, with me she whines on everything she says like she is
singing, and she fusses about everything. HELP ! :)
"They are all so wonderfully made. Just watch them, and see how unique they
are. Beautiful little people, grow up to be adults.......BE VERY CAREFUL
"Well written and very informative! "
"I have been having a difficult time with my son, he is 5. At home and at
school. I am a single parent and have tried every discipline, approach to
correcting his behavior and am at the point where I feel like throwing up
my hands and giving up. This article DEF helped give me very good tips AND
I could identify and see exactly how my son reacts, sensitivity level
towards certain situations- all situations, if he is distractable. It was
my Answer! I needed this A LOT!! This was awesome and gave me some new
approaches and tips to help me understand and better me understanding and
getting thru to my son and helping him as well. Thank you, thank you thank
"good ideas any for a 12 yr old who hates everything about school. no
respect for mom or teachers. do i seek school couseling. does this go on
to school records. help worried mom."
"My five year-old son is active and have lots of energy to burn. He is also
very intelligent, but when he can't have his way or don't want to do
something, boy can he throw a tantrum. I'm reading and buying all kinds
of books to assist him with understanding or at least expressing his
feelings. For example, I tell him that it is okay to get and angry and it
is okay to tell his teacher or someone that he is angry, but it not okay
to take action like hitting, kicking the desk or chair, students and tell
people that they are not his friend. He is very loving child and at home
he is a normal kid, but at school he know how to get what he wants by
throwing tantrums and sliding all over the place. "
"The comment that was posted on 10/01/08 describes by 7year old son to the
exact. I have been going through this for since first grade and with the
same school. I am so so frustrated and out of ideas, engery,emotions and
everything else. Giving up on my son is not an option for me but i dont
know what to do..he's been in counseling and now is seeing a play
therapist....Since he started second grade it started all over again...but
for the past three weeks...i get a call from his school every other day
and i either have to pick him, be his shadow or take him home. They have
already sent him to an alternative school for three days and i fear the
next time he will be put there for 3 to 6 months. The difficult part of
this all is that he is an A student but when he has been triggered it is
all downhill from there. He literally exlodes. I've shared with the
school all the triggers and the interventins that I use at home and that
the alternative school put in place last year. !
But it does not seem to be working....its just getting hard for me to
juggle a full time job, my 7 year old, my 13year old and all the reast of
my responsibilities. Yes, I am a single mother of two but I am doing all
that i can and crying out for help with my son....Please somebody
help....i need somebody to help me please!"
"My grandson is bright, ACTIVE, and talkative. His kindergarten teacher
has given him a special desk to do his work at because he finishes up his
work and wants to help others at the work group table and she doesn't want
him helping them do their work. Also, she doesn't provide anything else
for him to do when he is finished...so, being a five year old, he finds
something to do and gets into trouble. She wants him to learn to sit
quietly and wait???HELP"
"Just wanting some input on my 5 year old son's behavior. The last few months have been very challenging for me and my husband. He just turned 5 last week, and is in half day preschool. He chooses sometimes not to participate in activities at school and I guess pouts etc. I deal with it here at home too. When he doesn't get his way he has a fit. He gets frustrated when he can't make up his mind with certain things cause then he's worried that he might change it again and if that happens he has a tantrum. Now he is my only boy and is that baby and has 2 older sisters. The oldest sister and myself are guilty of spoiling him. Now I don't know if any of this is from him being spoiled or if there is a psychological issue that I may be overlooking. I don't know what to do. I am so frustrated that at times I find myself crying. I've done time out, grounding, taking away video games etc. I just don't know what to do anymore......HELP!!!"
"Very informative, thank you. My daughter is a great kid, very responsible for her age (10), but very pesitent, strong will perfectionist (her dad too). If something doesn't go the way she wants, she gets very angry. Role modeling, talking to her, trying to find calming stratedies... I tried it all. any suggestions where to go from here, I was thinking about some anger managment classes. "
"TO change behaviour 'experts' suggest it takes 4 weeks for every year of age. The worst is a child who doesn't talk except to correct others,is more negative than positive 90% of the time, WILL NOT be corrected by an adult regardless of the consequences and in fact gets worse upon being corrected (and believe me, the embarrasing public battle gets lots of unwanted attention with either stupid raised eyebrows or insipid, common sense suggestions). But you can't blame bystanders, they are not experienced with this by my judgement:
This child has had everything taken away including the bedroom door and bedframe with so many chances to earn them back.
Some children can seem like a lost cause and you want to give up. Sometimes, the parent situation is constant embarrasement though they do all the corrrect things including consistancy, the organization, earned privileges, parenting schools, doctors consults and counciling, and support of their child...
Be glad if your child is 'easy.' People say there is reward for the difficult child--I hope that reward comes soon!! Maybe it will happen in highschool--while other parents are struggling with their kids rebellion--we will have worked that all out:) "
"This was very informative. My daughter is the Intense, easily distracted one, while my son is much more calmer, yet must be motivated to do new things. I will try these suggestions."