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The lowdown on sexting

Everything you wanted to know about this teen smut trend but were afraid to ask.

By Phuong Ly
 

Thirteen-year-old Hope Witsell liked a boy and wanted him to notice her. So she sent a topless photo of herself to his cell phone — and received more attention than she'd bargained for. After another girl grabbed hold of the phone, the X-rated image  circulated throughout Hope’s Florida middle school.

Sexting may seem like old-fashioned flirting in a high-tech guise, but as Hope discovered, it can produce results far more dangerous than batting eyelashes ever did. First, Hope’s photo made her the target of bullying. Later, when the administration got involved, the photo became grounds for her suspension. Last September she hanged herself.

Tips on how to talk to your kids about sexting from the American Academy of Pediatrics

Tips on Internet safety for teens and parents from the National Crime Prevention Council

Hope was the second teen to commit suicide after a sexting incident. Jessica Logan, 18, of Cincinnati, Ohio, killed herself in July 2008 after her boyfriend forwarded explicit photos of her following the couple’s break-up.

Children trafficking children

Sexting has also fueled a new source of juvenile crime. Dozens of teens around the country have been arrested for sexting and charged with possession of child porn, a felony. After being convicted, one Orlando high school senior had to register as a sex offender, putting him on the same list as child molesters and rapists.

The images may look naughty — or even obscene — but experts say most of the teens sending them aren’t. According to Russell Sabella, a professor of school counseling who specializes in tech issues at Florida Gulf Coast University, kids who engage in sexting are simply naïve about the power of technology.

“They don’t realize how easy it is to lose control of information and data when it leaves their gadget,” he says. “It [starts out as] a social thing, but it can quickly come back to hurt them.”

Sexting statistics

As many as one in five teens have sent sexually suggestive photos of themselves to someone else, and a third have received such images, according to a study by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. About 22% of the 653 teens surveyed said that technology made them feel more forward and aggressive.

Another study suggests that the numbers of teens who are sexting is much lower but that older kids are far more involved.  According to the Pew Research Center’s Internet & American Life Project, 15% of the 800 teens polled said they had received explicit images, and 4% had sent them. But 17-year-olds were twice as likely to engage in sexting, compared to 12-year-olds. Girls were just as likely to be involved as boys. In focus groups, teens told researchers that sexting is used to experiment with sexuality or as part of a sexual relationship.

 
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Comments from GreatSchools.org readers

03/17/2010:
"Hmm, yes, about 22% of the 653 teens surveyed said that technology made them feel more forward and aggressive... But then 78% did not feel that way. I agree with the person who said it's a parenting problem. These kids who are doing this have no moral compass and are quite willing to blame it on the technology. Pretty sad! "
03/17/2010:
"I go through cell phones, back packs and purses. I pay the bill and I'm responsible for what goes in and out of my house. I'm very open about sex and not stupid to the fact it’s going to happen. I also understand drugs can also happen to very good kids. I was a teenager not that long ago. However, the one thing my kids won’t be able to say is I didn’t care enough to check. I grew up with friends who’s parents didn’t want to INVADE PRIVACY and when talking to those friends now. WE all say the same thing my parent should have looked a little closer and maybe that would not have happened. Now with that being said as a parent you can’t stop everything. Kid’s r going to have sex and maybe drugs but talking to your kids and educating them on the subject will help them to make their own decisions. Not to mention when they learn things such information about STDs it does come up in their conversations with their friends. The biggest thing about sexting is that one pict! ure can turn an Adult's world upside down when used with the wrong intentions. Teenagers are not yet ready to deal with that kind of attention no matter how cocky or secure they may act."
03/17/2010:
"To the person who thought that a school official shouldn't treat sexting as a police matter: Sexually explict photographs are considered to be pornography. Child porn (i.e., involving a minor) is illegal. There have been a couple of incidents involving sexting in our community and surrounding area and the police DO get involved, as well as the county District Attorney, because child porn is illegal. The school principal or other administrators don't have much choice but to cooperate. By the time a kid is in middle school or high school they should have more sense to know that this is wrong. When children are constantly exposed to poor role models on TV and radio, and more trash on video games, and get no moral direction from parents, I guess we can expect that things will go awry. Parents need to take responsiblity for their children. It's a sad state of affairs that this country is in."
03/17/2010:
"How to prevent sexting? Teach your kids what's right and wrong from a young age, and then they won't abuse the technology they have at their disposal! The mobile phones and digital technology are not the source of the problem here."
03/15/2010:
"Going through your child's cellphone is not the answer. I mean hi, there is this thing called delete! Talk to your child about it. Invading their privacy is not the answer. And as someone said earlier, the real problem is our nations taboo on nudity. It is the human body! It is natural and beautiful! "
03/15/2010:
"This is a very interesting article, as are the comments that have posted to date. The article said there was a survey where teens were asked about this, and the response was that the cell phone made them feel forward and aggressive. That would mean that this technology, be it cells phones, iPods, even cameras, is partially responsible. Without these items, the kids wouldn't feel forward or aggressive. Someone mentioned that before this technology, middle school student wouldn't have shown parts of their body, face to face... I disagree. When I was in school, this was done, not just the girls, but the boys too. Not often, with the chance of someone else seeing that it was not intended for, another student, faculty, but it was done. I think that too much emphasis is put on our own bodies, we cover them up and hide ourselves when our children come in unexpectedly. Talking about our nudity, sex or other things is normally pushed away by parents who are embarrassed, because their parents didn't discuss these things with their children. What is so wrong about the human body? We were all born without clothing. Adam and Eve wore no clothing, until the whole fruit incident. But really, if children are exposed to peoples bodies, and could talk about things that they don't understand or are concerned about... there wouldn't be such a 'mystery', about sex or our bodies. Make it less of a mystery, and you'll find that later in life when the kids reach 'the age', whatever age that is when kids start noticing the opposite sex, the mystery is taken out, and they don't have that question in the back of their mind, the mystery is gone. I know that the majority of the world will not agree with what I've said, and that's entirely okay, but if you would really think about it, and I mean really took your time to think about it, you might agree. I have always been open and very honest about sex, nudity, what happens at what age, the consequences of acting upon feelings with my children (4 girls). They are very well balanced teenagers all four of them. Don't get hung up on who likes who, who you like, if he's hurt you. These things can be extremely distractive, and the majority of the people you meet in school will not matter when you get older. You will make new friends that fit you better when you are older because you know who you are then, rather than the confusion of who are you, who are you going to be when you're a teenager."
03/11/2010:
"Well... Sorry to say this but I believe that sexting is going a bit too far... and kids shouldn't be pressured to do so in any relationship. But is it really that big a deal? Besides, maybe we wouldn't be so tempted to send and receive pictures like that if parents weren't so close minded about talking. Children who are curious about sex should have a right to ask their parents about it and get an honest answer, not awkward silence."
03/4/2010:
"I also want to add, that calling the sexual exploration by children 'smut' and 'sordid' is sick by itself. These are children who need to learn how to have healthy relationships. Calling them smutty won't help "
03/3/2010:
"I would never cooperate with any school official who would treat this as a police matter. We should be concerned about our child's emotional and sexual development without having to be worried that the behavior would be criminalized. "
03/1/2010:
"Very good article. This info needs to be at the front line of educating kids about what is out there that can harm them, as well as family. In my opinion, the teaching should be done as boldly and forthright as possible. Children are a precious gift from God that are to be cherished and protected from the vile preditors that are so ramport in our society today."
02/22/2010:
"I know a lot of kids who do that kind of thing, I am not necessarily friends with them though and I don't own a cell phone. Personally I don't mind cell phones or ipods as long as they stay in the lockers all during schools. I find the issue is in how much of a taboo nudity and sex is in our society, really if it weren't a almost illegal topic teenagers would not use it as another way to rebel. Now I do not support porn in any way because really use your common sense it is not that hard, if you don't have any that is a different matter entirely, and I wish there were a way I could help."
02/17/2010:
"Yes, most certainly the availability and proliferation of cell phones and other technology have brought this problem to a new level. But to put the blame on the cell phone or the technology itself is wrong. What happened parents teaching kids plain, old moral behavior? Back when you were in middle school would you have dreamed of baring any part of your private anatomy and showing it to a member of the opposite sex (or anyone)? Or sending a picture to another kid? I'm quite sure that most people out there say no, so why are kids so easily tempted to do that these days? Perhaps it's a lack of moral education! Let's turn off the TVs with the smutty talk and constant innuendo; It's inappropriate for children. Ditto for the video games. Let's stop dressing our pre-teens (and younger kids) like they were adults. Don't be in such a rush for your kids to grow up! And most of all - talk to your kids about what's appropriate and what's not - this doesn't start when the kids! get into middle school, it's a part of parenting that begins when they are toddlers. Get a clue out there, it's not the cell phones that are causing this problem!"
02/16/2010:
"This is another timely article. I have interrupted sexting pics as well as explicit messages and called those that sent it and told them I would be contacting their parents and the school if they didnt want to give me their parents info. I used it as an opportunity not to just scare them straight but opened a dialougue with each kid and everyone of them are not able to talk to their parents about sex. I believe that cell phones,ipods should be banned from school totally. We had no phones or ipods and if there was an emergency out parents were contacted via the school phone. Our kids would be able to really focus minus those technical distractions."
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