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Ask the Experts

My Child Says the Teacher Yells at the Class

By Dr. Joseph Gianesin, Behavioral Consultant

Question:

My daughter is in the fourth grade. She has been telling me that her teacher continually yells at her and the rest of the class.

She has informed me that her teacher talks to the class differently when other adults are in the classroom. She tells me that I would see for myself if there was a video camera in the classroom.

My daughter is convinced that her teacher hates her. I told her I would bring these issues up during parent-teacher conferences. Do you think I should do a few drop-ins prior to this parent-teacher meeting? Any ideas on how to keep my daughter encouraged about going to class?

Answer:

Two pieces of information stand out that concern me. First, the observation your daughter has made that the teacher acts differently and her attitude in class changes when other adults are present. Second, your daughter perceives her teacher as disliking her. (Whether this is true or not, it is her perception.)

I always counsel parents to talk with the teacher first and express their concerns. Stay focused on your daughter and describe how she feels - unwanted and not welcome in the class. If you keep the discussion focused on your child and how concerned you are about her, the teacher won't feel threatened and upset. Engaging the teacher as an ally in helping your child feel nurtured and wanted is important.

If the teacher fails to respond, the next step is to make an appointment with the principal indicating your concerns. Many principals walk around their buildings and listen closely to the tact and tone of teachers without the teachers' knowledge. The principal is the person who evaluates the teacher and he/she is concerned when teachers are not treating children respectfully.

As far as your daughter is concerned, we all will have a teacher or two that we won't click with. Encourage your daughter to talk about positive as well as negative experiences she is having at school. This helps her put the classroom day in a larger perspective.


Dr. Joseph Gianesin is a professor at Springfield College School of Social Work. He has more than 25 years of experience as a child and family therapist, a school social worker and a school administrator. Along with his academic appointment, Dr. Gianesin is a program and behavioral consultant for public schools in Massachusetts, helping them develop and manage programs for children with significant mental health problems.

Advice from our experts is not a substitute for professional diagnosis or treatment from a health-care provider or learning expert familiar with your unique situation. We recommend consulting a qualified professional if you have concerns about your child's condition.

Comments from GreatSchools.org readers

05/22/2012:
"Go in the classroom and observe. You should be able to read the teacher if she is faking when you are there. Trust me, you will know. "
05/21/2012:
"I suggest you all purchase your children recordable pens and let them record their teachers doing all this stuff they say their doing. And if the teachers are brazen enough to say it to your face, then that is when you file a formal complaint with the superintendent of the school district and drive over to the local news station with the recording. I am quite sure you will get the attention and education for your children and all the children in that school then. I am about to go there now. I have had some success with the principal and superintendent however, I am not too shy to call the newspaper or get an attorney. And just FYI shouting at my child....is considered assault and I would be at the local precinct having someone arrested for that. "
03/26/2012:
"My child is in a special ed 3rd grade class,she claimed that the teacher tells them that they have no brain and that she's very mean to them,she was so frantic that i about to get her brother into the same school that she said to me don't let him go in ms T class she's to mean.I'm about to get her out of that class or school , why should my child have to put up with this considering she's already disable,that would only make her worse and she wouldn't progress.these kids go through a lot and we don't know unless they can say a few words,i was lucky that she mimics everything she hears, something needs to be done about this. "
03/6/2012:
"We have a teacher that yells, calls the students retarded, tells them that they're useless. There have been many complaints about this teacher, students have signed petitions, parents have complained, and yet nothing has been done. Many kids are failing this class but yet nobody seems to think anything is wrong here. I've had a parent/teacher conference, and at certain times during the meeting, she made comments about the students asking her questions about the math problems...and this teacher told me that she told the students they were dumb, that they should know "this stuff" already. I've complained to the principal about her. Nothing. Now what?? My child that has never failed anything all through school is failing her class. I've heard students complain about her, other teachers complain about her. My child has to go to another math teacher in the school and ask for help because she cant get help from her own teacher. I've tried to take her out of this class and into a d! ifferent one, but the principal told me they couldn't do that. Help. If we could, we would move to another school district, but we're not able to do that. Even if we did, she would still be at that school, failing teaching the other students. "
02/16/2012:
"We got a big problem, my kids started in this district entering this year, they are all in elementary, 2 of my girls have problems reading, they have dyslexia but one of them have more problem, we are having a lot of trouble with her teacher, I tried to explain her what can work with my kid but is like talking with the wall, my girl feel so sad because when she ask for help in reading, the teacher roll her eyes like if is tired of her and she feels so embarrassed that she no want to ask for help anymore...I asked the teacher to put her the more close to her as possible so my kid no get distracted and the teacher moved her till the end of the room!!!! my kid feels so depressed, my other kid is having all the help needed and both are in the same grade, I am desperate, what I can do? can I change to another school still if I no change my address? We are very concerned because we are afraid if we go with the principal maybe the situation can get worst... "
02/13/2012:
"I've had the same experience when I was in 3rd grade. We moved during the summer to a town that was only ten miles from my old school when I was about 7 or 8 years old before school started. I must say that it is in my top five of worse school experiences ever. The teacher had moved from teaching 7th graders for over a number of years to teaching 3rd graders the year I started; sadly I was in the 'lucky' amount of studnts who had gotten her. She would constantly 'misplace'' work we've done in class or homework and claim we didn't turn it in then have it magically reappear on her desk a week or so after making us all clean our desks out (even when they weren't messy) during recess. A number of times she had kept certain kids back during an art class or music class and make us redue work she had admitted to misplacing. I remember begging my parents to let me go back to my old school after being centered out as a 'trouble maker'. I won't lie, I literally hated that school. I re! member times I cried so much until I got sick to my stomach so I wouldn't have to go to school that year. When the second or third parent-teacher conference came around my parents decided it was time to go because my grades went from being above average down to being close to F's. They didn't even consider what I had been saying since they assumed that I was being like this because it was hard to adjust. I recall my parents being upset though when they picked me up that night from my grandma's, but they wouldn't tell me what happen. When the next school year came around I was thankful I wasn't held back. I was in a classroom at the other end of the hall from my third grade one and I remember numerous occasions of my fourth grade teacher closing the door because of that teacher yelling at her students. I am now 19 and just a couple years ago I learned what had made my parents upset during the parent teacher coference during my 3rd grade year. The teacher said she had 'diagnosed' me with having ADD and that I requird medication that would make me much more clamer and focused in class. In reality I was a quiet student and rarely spoke out in class after moving to the school district. Apparently even bringing this up with the principal of that school at the time then to the board office only resulted in them causing some unwanted attention to myself all the way to the day I graduated. "
02/6/2012:
"I have watched my kids go through this exact experience as they have gone through school. I have tried the tactics you suggest and they are not very effective. If a teacher behaves this way, when they meet with a parent, they will pretend to care, pretend to listen and then when they are back with your child they will make life miserable. Same with the administration...they always smile and then ultimately side with their teachers. Remember that teachers have all power in the classroom, and they make this clear to your child at a very young age. This approach creates consequences for a child, and teaches them not to talk to Mom. In the end, unless the administration is going to move your child, the lesson is that they have to tough it out...because 'that is life'. If teachers behave this way, they should be re-trained so they utilize effective classroom management technigues or fired. I couldn't behave this way in world outside of academia. "
02/3/2012:
"Wow, your story sounds exactly what we are going thru. I always make sure to listen to what he has to say and neer undermind the teacher in front of him. But I always adress any of his concerns with her and I get no where. The entire elemetary he goes to has almost adopted a way of treating the kids, AND ITS NOT THE WAY THEY WOULD TREAT THEM WITH PARENTS AROUND. I think that teachers need to attend training on whats the appropriate way to interact, talk to, and punish other peoples kids. You wouldn't beleive some of the things Ive witnessed. I am 32 and look very young for my age and am only 5 ft. tall so when Im in the school teachers and faculty do not immediatly recognize me as an adult. I have heard teachers, maintnence personal, and faculty, yelling at k-5th graders as if they were a drill seargent. I have been grabbed up, hard, by my elbow by a teacher and yanked into a line of students walking down the hall. (She thought I was a student walking out of line! Um, thats! still no way to get them back into line!) I have witnessed a teacher who was watching my sons class walk to lunch and my 4 yr old accidently tripped him and the teacher thought he was running she yelled grabbed his arm and got right in his face and yelled you do not run! Now walk back to your classroom and start over! I can still picture the way her hand was white because of how hard she had ahold of him. When my lil one was in kindergarden he said, "Mommy Ms ### screams alot and sometimes when she yells at me she gets spit on my face." Now, this tells me 2 things, 1. shes too close. 2. shes too mad. He said that when he was bad she would walk him back to the classroom squeezing his hand extremly tight the whole way!! I am always thinking about what I alone can do to start spreading the awareness and putting a stop to teachers abusing our lil ones! They are there to teach, not enjoy a power trip on helpless children! "
01/19/2012:
"Take it from me, an 8th grade student. Unless your child is claiming incidents in which they were yelled at even though they were uninvolved, you should not be concerned. I have rarely ever been in trouble at school, but I have, on countless occasions, seen children who have really done nothing get punished due to a lack of evidence suggesting a culprit in a case. These students, however, are almost always troublemakers. If a teacher has no clue who did something, amd she has the choice between a goody two shoes and a troublemaker, she will always choose the troublemaker. On that note, if your child truly follows directions and listens to the teacher, it is simply her responsibility to survive. I gauruntee that as long as your child behaves, her teacher will leave her alone, and she will get through it. I have made it this far, and so can your daughter. "
11/28/2011:
"After telling students calmly 10 times to sit down, to be quiet, to pay attention teachers eventually have to yell to be heard. Children do not mind and they know the teacher can do very little when a child disrupts class- 2 minute time out at recess! "
10/31/2011:
"All schools have intercom systems in the classrooms, so the principal could listen in. If this teacher is yelling, other teachers near by can hear her. I would send a voice activated recorder in my childs bookbag for a day and listen for myself.if you talk to the teacher she will be aware of what she is doing and may stop for a while. Her behavor will return and she will have bad feelings towards your child.I woul talk to the principal, and other parents to see if thier children tell the samre story. This teacher may have something going on away from school, just like ALL of us do.If only your child says she yells then just keep it between you and the teacher. "
10/19/2011:
"The teacher should not yell to the kids! It's wrong i think! Never ever lay your hands o. Children like spanking them that's cruel I think! You should talk to the teacher! It's just gonna ruin the relationship eith your daughter and the teacher if u don't work it out! :) not trying to be mean I think that's true though "
09/26/2011:
"wow, what a response from a teacher? and mis-spelled whining... lovely. teachers are humans, but, children are fragile given our times. for a teacher to yell (like my daughter's teacher does) for no reason other than just being a horribly crabby and miserable person is REDICULOUS! Shame on them -- they are there to mold children THAT IS THEIR JOB! I don't want my child to think that crabby and yelling is appropriate. SHAME ON THEM!!!! "
09/19/2011:
"i am a teacher-maybe you should just let the teacher teach and you should stop complaining-children act differently at school than at home-let your child go to school and behave-i am sick of wining parents-if you can do better go teach-or i have an idea why don't i complain about the way you do your full time exhausting job-ok-enough said!! "
08/18/2011:
"My fifth grader is stuck In a class with none of her friends and with ungifted students she is now screaming and yelling how she hates the priceable and we are not allowed to change classes and she refuses to go to school unless she is moved she also refuses to be friends with ungifted people what do I do and she will not take you can't or no for a answer what do I do "
01/31/2011:
"My first grade son complains of his teacher screaming and talks verry loud to him. He also mentiones that she makes him feel verry nervous. I have had several issues with her complaining of him, and she also intimidates me. I already made her aware of the way my son feels. She was surprised and said that he just gets embarrassed in class when she talks to him. Who should I speak to?"
10/13/2010:
"If you have a concern about a teacher yelling at your child, immediately make an appointment to meet and professionally and kindly address the concern. If the problem continues, follow the uniform complaint procedure until it is resolved. The UCP is similar to going through the chain of command - principal, etc... Complaints to the District office will get tossed back to the school principal if the UCP has not been followed. Parents do not have a right to visit classrooms unannounced. They have a right to visit for periods of time, usually with the principal or other staff member. This is to avoid distractions in the classroom and protect the rights of the other students. Another person may accompany just to make sure that the observation is objective."
09/29/2010:
"I am currently going through the exact same problem. My daughter is 7 and has h=just moved into her new class in the Juniors and since starting in this class the little girl I collect from school is not the same child I dropped off. I have never seen her so sullen looking and emotional. There have been incidents every day where my daughter tells me that she was called naughty and punished for doing something that she has not done. Last last 4 years that my daughter has been in school have been fabulous, no complaint from any teacher and she has loved every moment of it. She is an outstanding student, extremely well behaved (proof of which she was house captain last year) and was very confident until she met her new teacher. Last week she admitted to imagining after an incident with the teacher getting her book bag coat, collecting her little sister from her class and leaving the school! Monday she burst into tears and told me that she wishes that there was a video came! ra in her classroom so that everyone could see how she was treated by her teacher! I have a meeting with the head teacher on Friday.... :/"
04/19/2010:
"Dont do anything too bad. My reading teacher is like that. She yells at us every day and if you try to explain why you dont have an assinment, she wont let you speak. Every time a different teacher walks in, she act all nice to us to make herself look good. A few days ago, she told a boy to go back to in house even thouh he said the teacher there told him to come back and she kicked him out! I know how your girl feels. My parents also want to disscuss the matter but they dont understand it will make it worse. Your girls teacher will know she doesn't like her and give her a harder time. She will just have to put up with the teacher as I put up with mine. It is only for a year so hang strong. Soon it will be over. Take it from a girl who knows how your child feels."
02/1/2010:
"well,i will drop off unexpected i do @ my sons school all the time due to the fact he always cae very sad and the lil words he had he didn't want to use..my son has pdd-nos and his special ed teacher i thought was nice and warming etc the fact is that 1day i went there and found her screaming @ the top of her lungs to my son..and i over heard a teacher tell another student in spainsh cualquiera te cay insemia which means that she wanted to just jump on him so i confronteed bith teachers and reported them as well...since then i have had issues i just yes2day she calls me and tell me she doesn't have patients 4 my sons behavioral and wants to make me feel like im the issue when is clear my son just 3years old has major sensory,behavioral issues i mean good teachers are suppose to show love and care to our children so school can b fun and a rich happy learning place not a place where they dont want to b im fed up with all these teachers and therapists i have seen awful things..! and the truth is when the teachers r aware that u r@ the school they make everything 'perfect' 1)drop in without them knowing 2)write down what u see and how she reacts 2) diff situations in the classroom 3)make a meeting with her don;t attack her say some good things u see in her and some of ur concerns and how your daughter feels and maybe that will help hope that shes not a horrible person and then things get worst bc of what ur daughter has told u if so the next step is the principal good luck "
01/26/2010:
"As a parent you always have the right of going to your child's classroom unannounced. Yes, you should bring this issue up to the school principal first, after you've done your own investigation. Then, when you go to the parent/teacher meeting you address it as well. According to your daughter, the teacher is aware of her yelling, because you daughter states that the teacher has a different tone when other adults are around. This sounds like a teacher who does not like her job or her students. If your daughter is not happy in the class, she needs to be removed or something has to be done about this teacher. Children should be comfortable in the classroom, if they're not, they can't learn. Ivy"
01/19/2010:
"Teachers with personality disorders should be fired, but the unions won't allow that to happen. It is rare that a teacher actually falls into that category, so let me explain what usually is the case. 'I got yelled at,' can mean that the teacher, in a calm voice reprimanded your child or corrected a mistake the child made. Find out your child's definition before you imagine what happened. 'In front of the whole class,' may be true. If the behavior was in front of the whole class the response should be, too. 'The teacher doesn't like me,' could mean that in 4th grade the class size is 35 students instead of 20. At this grade level students are expected to work independently more of the time. As they adjust some children miss the personal attention. It also can mean that a behavior that was tolerated in a former class interferes with the current teacher's style of teaching. There may be an adjustment period before your child changes. 'School is boring,' can mean that the student has not yet realized that school is not an entertainment venue. The teacher cannot perform a 6-7 hour daily show that makes long division as exciting as a science experiment. Good teachers want and need input from our students even before we hear from their parents. It is offensive to hear of a problem from the principal before we are even aware of it. The teacher's job is to help you raise an educated, responsible, and independent child to adulthood. Working as a team we can accomplish this."
11/2/2009:
"My daughter is in 6 grade and she has a problem with her teacher. The teacher has over 20 years of teaching experience, but she gets mad at my daughter very easily. Today she yelled at her on front of her friends for doing her math homework during social studies class. She stood very close to my daughter and yelled that 'your mom told me that you have a bad attitude, but I will not allow you to bring it to school'. I felt bad. I told her that, but it was a general conversation about how much children change in their preteens years. My daughter is not a brat, she started talking back to me lately, but it is easy to control. I think it is totally not exeptable for a teacher to say something like that to any child, and especially to a child who really doesn't deserve it. She never missed any homework, always does everything in time, and very responsible. She made a mistake by not listening to the lecture, and should be punished by swiching her card, getting paw, but not going t! hrough that comments. I talked to the teacher already, they had previous incedent, when my daughter was playing with her new pen during the lecture, and she told me that my daughter just showed little attitude, but nothing serious. I know that the best thing to do is to switch the teacher, but we did it already on the beginning of the year. My daughter didn't have any personal issues with her first teacher, but her academic performance dropped, so we asked the principle to switch us to another class. In her present class she is one of top students, but her teacher seems don't like her. I hate to go back and tell the principle that we are not happy again. I really don't know what to do. "
09/18/2009:
"It is easy for a parent to sit back and criticize a teacher or an assistant for doing things that is not to their liking. I am a parent and an educator and sometimes we have to raise our voices to be heard over the screaming and the disrespect we receive from the students. Disrepect is a learned behavior that comes from the home. I would be willing to guess that the things that you commented on were said right in front of your child. It was people like this that said no more paddling and no more prayer, we lost your children a long time ago. Not all children are spanked but I guarantee, you would not stand in a classroom and take a child cussing at you, hitting or spitting at you. I challenge each of you to spend 1 week in a classroom with all of children that they put in a classroom and see if you want to scream as you say. Raising the voice is a little different from screaming. I am sorry about your little girl but sometimes it is necessary to raise your voice to ge! t the children's attention. "
06/2/2009:
"Take your child out of that school."
06/2/2009:
" Pull your child out or try to change teachers as your child has probably developed good friendshps already. I am a teacher for preschoolers. I once worked at a center where other teachers yelled. It was horrible, their emotional safety is of concern when this happens. Teachers, more than anyone are TAUGHT how to handle 'difficult' children...with calmness and patience. When kids see that they're getting a 'rise' out of an adult, they keep on. If the teacher asks them calmly to stop and gives them a warning with a consequence..such as staying after school (I don't agree with missing recess as that might be the best way for the child to release energy) and then the teacher follows through, the kids should stop. Otherwise the teacher should make a phone call or send an email to the parents about the issue. When the teachers yelled where I worked I went to the director about it, but nothing was done. I quit and now I'm at a much better place. There is really nothing you can do about a bad temperd teacher. Just pray each year that your child gets a wonderful, patient teacher."
05/13/2009:
"My son had a teacher that did this. I made a 'surprise visit' right before lunch. Of course NOTHING was done to reprimand the teacher. NOTHING works, even going to the school districts superintendents office. Don't hold your breath on anything changing lady. Your best bet is to change schools or teachers(We had to do this plus for other various reasons)."
05/7/2009:
"I am a teacher myself and let me tell you, it is easier said than done. When you are learning classroom management sometimes the class gets out of control! You don't mean to pick on anyone but it usually is the same 3 or 4 kids that are out of their seats, screaming, chasing each other and wont stop talking. I have a student who thinks I don't like them, but the truth is I love all my students...it just gets frustrating when its the same student and you tell them over and over again to do something. Always talk to the teacher, because kids at this age 3rd-8th grade sometimes feel that way when it might just be a miscommunication problem."
04/7/2009:
"First of all I am a mother of a 3rd grader and my son has been bullied all year. The teacher yells at ALL the children. Her tone is ridiculous and now the Superintendent is involved. NO TEACHER has the right to raise there voice to any child unless they have to yell there names because they are in danger of being hurt or hurting someone else. If a child with a disability is making THE TEACHER angry, then shame on that teacher. You are a teacher for a reason and I advise this parent with this problem to believe her daughter and go straight to the principal and if no changes happen, go directly to the superintendent. Schools need to open there eyes. To not make a child feel they deserve to be yelled at by the one and only person they should feel safe with in school, the teacher. "
09/25/2008:
"What if the child is correct in her perception? Unless the 4th grader in question is very mature and articulate it will be very difficult for the Principal to take the side of the 4th grader. The child will be perceived as having a 'problem' The child will be 'labelled' and every incident thereafter will be shown in a negative light to justify this 'label'. I have children in the NYC Public School system and I have a lot of experience or know of many parents who have experienced similar situations. Perhaps the schools are different where you are, but from my experience any issues raised by children that attempt to show the teacher or school official in a negative way is often perceived negatively and 'rewarded' with punishment, ridicule and abuse."
07/28/2008:
"I see some parents here questioning what to do. I feel you have to follow the chain of responsibility. Talk to the teacher, then the principal, then if the principal backs the teacher and does not give you any options to change classes you are in the acute decision mode; first pick a new school if possible, or pull your child out and homeschool if you can, and DO tell your school board member and the superintendent. The superintendent needs to know if a principal is allowing this kind of behavior, and so do the school board members, so they can work together to find a solution. Only the superintendent can reassign or fire a principal; school boards only have one employee, the superintendent. If several principals are letting things slide, the school board can start looking for a more attentive superintendant. My daughter had her hair pulled and was shouted at in class too. I still can't believe those teachers call themselves 'professional' when there is no other profes! sion that allows shouting at the clients (maybe fitness coach?) but the principals can't do anything unless they are informed... write down the incidents so you can give facts, not just emotion."
04/4/2008:
"yelling should be banished from school becuase it is just another way for teachers to punish harmless children like myself"
03/12/2008:
"im a student nd i agree exactly on what this 4th grader says nd im in the 5th grade see what the thing is the teacher always yells at us nd put the blame on us but when an adult is around the teachers act all sweet and innocent but 1 thing i do noe is i cant stand her at all she is a lier nd she loves to get people in trouble haha may i have a word of advice please!!!!????"
10/22/2007:
"My daughter is in 5th grade and has a teacher that yells at the class. My daughter has had two anexiety attacks and has asked to move to a different class or school. The teacher is a big man, very intimidating looking. My husband met with him (after the first anexiety attack) and the teacher was very nice. Since the meeting though, he continues to yell at the class even when one or two students cause the trouble. His class has some of the best standard test scores in the school so I hate to transfer my daughter but I can't watch her have anxeity attacks. She's 10 years old and a good student and a good kid. The teacher has a rep for yelling so at the beginning of the year I told my daughter to obey his rules and he won't yell at you. Well, she obeys his rules but he continues to yell at (and punish - missed recess time) the entire class. I spoke to him last week and have my parent/teacher conference today. I hate to move her but my daughter is my first priority. A! ny ideas????"
10/11/2007:
"Yelling should be abolished like spanking has been -- it's destructive and counterproductive. My daughter is in 2nd grade and based on our experience so far, it's pretty common for teachers to yell at their students. Her pre-school/pre-K teacher was so severe that she stopped writing her name and begged not to go to school. I had a talk with the teacher and worked out for the other teacher to work with my daughter on academics but the scars persist. Her K teacher was perfection; there were complaints of yelling in 1st (which ended when a high maintenance child was transferred to another class) and now my daughter doesn't want to go to 2nd grade because her teacher yells. No wonder home schooling is so popular!"
04/12/2007:
"Sometimes teachers seem to take out their frustration on the whole class for the misbehavior of a few annoying students. Some teachers have less patience and then teachers are notorious for not getting paid enough. I think it's best to chat with the teacher, then principal and switch classes if you know of a better classroom. Otherwise change schools!"
01/2/2007:
"I think it's inappropriate for a teacher to be 'yelling' at the kids. If it's true if there are behavior problems she should address it in a calm authoritive manner she should give out detentions, hold kids in at recess, notify parents, send kids to the office etc. It sounds to me that yelling might be her favorite tool to getting the childrens attention and it's not working. I would go and speak to the teacher ask her about it and express your concern. If however the behavior continues I'd have a meeting with the principle and have her look into it. If still no resolution spend time in the classroom. Also see if you can't talk to other parents and see if other children have the same complaint. Because the important thing is to keep your child excited about school and having a teacher she feels is approachable so she can blossom in the class. And at some point the teacher, your child, you and your husband will have to sit down and talk about the specific incidences and work ! thru it.And if you do find out that perhaps your daughter 'isn't being an angel' it's still not a good reason to be yelling and acting different towards the children when other parents aren't around. "
01/2/2007:
"As a fourth grade teacher myself I know that they tend to talk more than other grades. When I taught 1st and 2nd they talked less and were more repectful. A question I would ask your daughter is....'Do the students act differently when other adults are in the room?' Most likely the answer is yes. Fourth graders like to push things to the limit. When we were children the parents often supported the teachers first. However in today's society parents back their children first and have a tendancy to blame the teacher for every problem that occurs. I do feel that there is something not right here though because the child feels unliked. When talking to the teacher you may bring that up first and see her reaction. Before going to the principal give things some time. "
12/27/2006:
"Yelling teachers happens more than you think,although some teachers try their best to control the yelling in the classroom. Some very frustrated teachers find this method works to get the classes attention. I don't really agree with this method I have seen some very misbehaved children and sometimes the way to get their attention is to yell at them.I don't think all the children in the class should have to be yelled at. I have been through this as well with some of my childrens' teachers and the best approuch is to talk and communicate with the teacher about how this is affecting your child.Communication with the child teacher and parent are very Important!"
12/26/2006:
"My daughter had confided in me that her teacher was yelling at her class and did not feel like the teacher liked her or her classmates. This is after she had told me that she would raise her hand in class to ask a question and the teacher would ignore her and even if she went to her desk to ask a question. I had also seen on one of her papers that the teacher made her write one of her multiplication problems that she had missed 50 times.My daughter had an A in her class but it was gradually going down while her other grades were good. I knew it was time for me as a parent, to have a conference with this teacher. I expressed my concerns to her calmly and listened to her, and she told me she didn't yell and she would not ignore anyone anymore who raised their hand or came to her desk.I also had told her the meeting went well and I hope future incidents would not arise.The next day, she apologized to her class if they felt like she was yelling, and told them to feel free to com! e to her any time or her I told my daughter to always come to me first thing when something as this was going on so we can solve it sooner. I was approached by other parents, also about this certain teacher whose children had her in the past and now have her, and had told me similar situations happen. But not many had gone to her, because they thought of reprucussions on their child. I took the chance and hopefully it will be better. If not, our next step is to go to the principal. Remember, as a parent, listen to your chikd and observe how he or she talks about their classes."
12/21/2006:
"I agree.This just recently happened to us with my son's class(fourth grade),since their teacher left,they had been having substitute since Oct.One day it was the assistant principal who took over the class, my son came home and said the asst principal yelled at them all the time.Now,I have heard this before since this person came to the school, but never complained about it.This time I went to the principal and complained and later on she came back to the classs and apologized.It is also a good idea to drop-in to the class and talk to the teacher.I offer to volunteer and spent time with my children( if time allows) during their lunch time.Parents are equal partnership with teachers for better education of our children."
12/20/2006:
"My son's teachers (four of them)put on one front for the parents and their demeanor is very degrading to the students in the classroom. I have been told that the principal is aware of the situation but will always back his teachers. This has been going on for years at this grade level. (sixth) I have three more children to see through this school. Do I talk to the principal anyway or go directly to the School Superintendant or school board?"
12/20/2006:
"I disagree; the young girl feels like this because of the yelling and different behavior of the teacher when other adults are around. Kids pick up on attitude alot faster than adults(we have discounted our intuition too long). I would go to the principal first and address the difference of teacher behavior; then talk to the teacher maybe the principal can sit in and discuss options. Whatever is done the young girls' perceptions must not be discounted. "
12/20/2006:
"I had this problem with my son's third grade teacher. I discussed the problem with the principal, but everytime he observed the classroom she knew it and she had a different demeaner. I think it is a common problem when you have to many students in one classroom."
12/19/2006:
"I totally disagree. I went through a similar experience and not only the teacher resented talking about it that other teachers at the scholl took a very different attitude towards my child as well as myself. That was in third grade. During the fourth grade I have avoided completely trying to resolve issues with the teachers and opted out to discuss first with the principal. She was made aware of what happennned previously and has been instrumental on resolving this kind of issues. It is actually rare to find teachers which will not take things personal. Not every child is the same and some teachers may not realize their demeanor or tone of voice may me treathening."
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