By Kristin Stanberry
In the course of seeking help for your child with learning or attention problems, have you ever experienced conflict with someone at your child's school, in the community, or even in your own family? If so, rest assured you are not alone. The complexity, emotions, and energy involved in parenting a child with special needs can take a toll on you and your relationships with others. It's not uncommon for misunderstandings and conflict to occur.
We recently surveyed parents of children with learning and attention problems about conflict in their lives. More than a thousand parents responded to our survey, answering our questions and providing tried-and-true tips. That puts a lot of power - a strong, collective voice - behind their tips and advice, presented in this article.
|We asked: Have you had interpersonal conflict with any of the following people when seeking help for your child with learning and/or attention problems?
|Family member (spouse, your child, another family member)||53%|
|Teacher (general, special education, resource specialist)||74%|
|School administrator (principal, school psychologist, etc.)||60%|
|School district administration (superintendent, special education director, IEP team)||36%|
|Doctors or other health care provider (or their staff)||18%|
|Others. Examples survey respondents shared include: parents of other children (e.g., "those with normal children"), coaches and scout leaders, friends, tutors, government agency personnel, psychiatrist/therapist/counselor, and members/leaders of a religious community||13%|
When we asked parents to rate their own conflict resolution skills, interestingly, their responses indicate that even those who are generally confident in their skills find that their ability to handle conflict varies in different situations - and with different people. Here is what they told us:
|In general, do you feel you are successful in resolving interpersonal conflict?|
|I don't know||13%|
|How do you rate your skills in handling conflict?|
|Could use improvement||38%|
|It depends on the situation/people involved.||41%|
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